Elnut is home and LIFE STINKS!!!!

[elnutsmalljaws]

I should be sitting at Dale Hollow right now on my favorite spot with All Pro FNF rod in hand, Duck Red and Chart jig tied on with some Garlic Fish Dope on the jig head, 11 foot leader making cast down my favorite spot just waiting for Mrs. 5lb Brownfish to come and join the party. Insead I am sitting here typing on this stupid laptop with an incision so deep you can bury your hands past your wrist inside my abdominal area. LIFE STINKS, can't even get a month where my body will co-operate and let me FNF fish with my buddy's. Supposed to Defend the Billy Westmoreland Title from last year with Catchemall, NOT, Supposed to fish with my buddy Chunknwind this weekend, NOT, Supposed to fish with EASmallie this coming week, NOT, Supposed to fish with my buddy Bill haunet on Friday, NOT, supposed to fish with my buddy 3sons just about every day of the month, NOT. LIFE STINKS and my body has let me down again. What a kick to the gut. How much can a fella take in his life? Sick and tired of hearing, "it will get better", "the Lord only puts on you what you can candle", "what does not kill you only makes you stronger", "blah blah blah blah" Give me a terminal disease, one with a date in minde, give me 6 months to live, 6 weeks to live, 6 days to live, not this hinky dory bull crap that I go thru over and over and over. Supposed to have Gall Stone and Kidney Stone surgery in January and now that is moved out to the end of 2011 because of my emergency infected abcess surgery last friday. Just keep adding the years on and on and on, 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, and now 2011. Keep them coming because I don't care anymore. I will not plan anything EVER again. Tired of planning something and then my body lets me down like now. Never been so low in my life. Thanks for those that sent well wishes in your emails, pm's, phone calls and such. No disrespect but I have given up on well wishes and hoping to get better becasue that is not goin to happen.

[kygorski]

Yes life isn't fair.And that is A BUNCH OF BULL ABOUT THE HANDLING PART. A hospice minister said to me once, that is something he'd never tell anyone.And he was accostomed to seeing the misery of a lot of people on the way out, patients and family.I've been through the "why me" several times, its becoming second nature sort of.Watching loved ones paralized, stricken with altziemers, cancer,and you wonder if its all worth it. Then I think of my son and daughter, two good things finally happened to me. I've had a lot of bad days also, but something I think about6 is thisMy bad days are better than some folks good days.Ya'll take care.

[stripernut]

elnut, more than anything i wish you peace of mind.

[goosecreekguy]

elnut, more than anything i wish you peace of mind.

X2

Life isn't about what happens to us, but about how we react to what happens to us. I'm glad you're home. I still plan on hitting the creek together.

[fish-on]

Elwood pm sent

[HURRICANEBOB]

"Supposed to Defend the Billy Westmoreland Title from last year with Catchemall, NOT, Supposed to fish with my buddy Chunknwind this weekend, NOT, Supposed to fish with EASmallie this coming week, NOT, Supposed to fish with my buddy Bill haunet on Friday, NOT, supposed to fish with my buddy 3sons just about every day of the month, NOT."

Man, you're doing lots better than me. I can't even get that many trips on the "planned list". Besides, who wants to fish in 11 degree weather.

[zx150]

Hang in there brother. Every day you get to see your family is a good day. I will say a prayer for you.

[elnutsmalljaws]

"Supposed to Defend the Billy Westmoreland Title from last year with Catchemall, NOT, Supposed to fish with my buddy Chunknwind this weekend, NOT, Supposed to fish with EASmallie this coming week, NOT, Supposed to fish with my buddy Bill haunet on Friday, NOT, supposed to fish with my buddy 3sons just about every day of the month, NOT."

Man, you're doing lots better than me. I can't even get that many trips on the "planned list". Besides, who wants to fish in 11 degree weather.

My buddy 3sons had rented a cabin for the whole month for him and I to fish. There were some days when we had others coming to fish with us and some days when he left to go back home that I stayed and days when I went home and he stayed. Basically the trip was all month long. Does not matter because I don't plan on making any more trips to fish. Ready to sell it all and get out of fishing all together. That way my body won't disappoint me over and over again when I am trying to do something that I love.

[bassmanshawn]

My buddy 3sons had rented a cabin for the whole month for him and I to fish. There were some days when we had others coming to fish with us and some days when he left to go back home that I stayed and days when I went home and he stayed. Basically the trip was all month long. Does not matter because I don't plan on making any more trips to fish. Ready to sell it all and get out of fishing all together. That way my body won't disappoint me over and over again when I am trying to do something that I love.

small jaws i dont have a clue what you are going thur it would be easy for me to say what ever but i know one and you do also that knows how many hairs are on our head and every thought and every thought we have he can do anything he being god you me any body all we can do is put it all in his hands and be thankfull that we are breathing and can talk to our love ones no matter had bad it is it could always be worse pray ask god he can help friends love ones would love to make everything better but the only one that can change your life is god my god bless you be thankfull your here make the most that ya can every moment ya have here i hope and pray that you get to go fish and fish and fish i understand your passion for fishing i truly feal the same and i thank god that i get to fish some maybe not what i want but some rember its great to be alive

[easmallie]

This is no consolation, but all you've been through has made you the person you are. Do anything for anybody, compassionate, caring, and just an all around great person to be around (not to mention more laughs than YouTube). Don't quit the fight. There will be more Billy's for you to win. More Decembers for us to fish. More 5#'ers to land (don't worry we'll throw 'em back). Hang in there.....

[elnutsmalljaws]

Tired of fighting. Tired of hearing it will get better. Tired of Doctors scratching their heads wondering what to do because they don't have a clue. Tired of all the antibiotics and other drugs that make me feel terrible. 500 days in the hospital, needless to say tired of hospitals. Because of my Pseudomonous and MRSA I am put in Isolation everytime so I don't get to see my son while I am in the hospital, which stinks. I was stuck 47 times in trying to get 8 different IV's started and my arms look like I have been beat with baseball bats. Literally I am sick and tired of being sick and tired.

Surgeries - 1/08, 6/08, 10/08, 11/08, 12/08, 6/09, 7/09, 2/10 and 12/10 are the last 9 surgeries with no rhyme or reason. 27 surgeries since 2004, average 1 surgery every 3 months and then throw in both lungs collapsed plus 3 bouts of internal bleeding (none that required surgery) and there is no telling what is next. Just flat out tired of fighting

[easmallie]

Can't say I know anything about your fight...Never a major thing wrong here. All I can say is I really enjoyed by two days with you last year and I like most would like to have to more of them. Like most everyone who's known and fished with you. Yes we're selfish...