Stimulus Payment Information

For those of you wondering about the stimulus check you're most likely to recieve at some point this year I thought I would pass along some information to you that was given to me. This is a very exciting new program that I will explain using the Q and A format, let us begin:

Q. What is an Economic Stimulus Payment?
A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.

Q. Where will the government get this money?
A. From taxpayers.

Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?
A. Only a smidgen.

Q. What is the purpose of this payment?
A. The plan is that you will use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.

Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China?
A. Shut up.


Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the US economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:

If you spend that money at Wal-Mart, all the money will go to China.
If you spend it on gasoline it will go to the Arabs.
If you purchase a computer it will go to India.
If you purchase fruit and vegetables it will go to Mexico, Honduras, and Guatemala (unless you buy organic).
If you buy a car it will go to Japan.
If you purchase useless crap it will go to Taiwan.

And none of it will help the American economy.

We need to keep that money here in America.

You can keep the money in America by spending it at yard sales, going to a baseball game, or spend it on alcohol (domestic ONLY), or tattoos, since those are the only businesses still in the US.

Or eat out at a local good resturant, leave a tip. As for me, IF I get one, I'll wisely invest it,with a chance for very good retrurn, while I watch a young long legged lass bring me a libation of choice[gratis if I choose], while I watch reels spinning and holding my breath waiting for the big one.Jackpot or the other. My cousins qwife had a heart attack at a casino, and died on the spot. We all asked did she win? He didn't know he was fishing, and didn't find out till that evening.Those family members who attended the sevices later, returned to that same place, and in memorium all played the quarter she died at.True tale. The service was in the upper peninsula of mich. and far to far for me to drive.

I hope everyone knows the Stimulas check is [B]*** Only an [U](Advance)[/U] on next years tax refund ***[/B] It's not any extra money, it's ours to begin with......

[QUOTE=Chubminnow;356680]


Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the US economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:

If you spend that money at Wal-Mart, all the money will go to China.
If you spend it on gasoline it will go to the Arabs.
If you purchase a computer it will go to India.
If you purchase fruit and vegetables it will go to Mexico, Honduras, and Guatemala (unless you buy organic).
If you buy a car it will go to Japan.
If you purchase useless crap it will go to Taiwan.

And none of it will help the American economy.

We need to keep that money here in America.

You can keep the money in America by spending it at yard sales, going to a baseball game, or spend it on alcohol (domestic ONLY), or tattoos, since those are the only businesses still in the US.[/QUOTE]

I am going to give a chunk of mine to Dave Stewart - he is about as American as you can get. Anyone else want to go?