Why I like retirement

[B][B]And they ask---Why I Like Retirement[/B][/B]
[B]
[B]Question: How many days in a week? [/B][/B]
Answer: 6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday [B]

[B]Question: When is a retiree's bedtime? [/B][/B]
Answer: Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.
[B]
[B]Question: How many retirees to change a light bulb? [/B][/B]
Answer: Only one, but it might take all day. [B]

[B]Question: What's the biggest gripe of retirees? [/B][/B]
Answer: There is not enough time to get everything done.
[B]
[B]Question: Why don't retirees mind being called Seniors? [/B][/B]
Answer: The term comes with a 10% percent discount. [B]

[B]Question: Among retirees what is considered formal attire? [/B][/B]
Answer: Tied shoes. [B]

[B]Question: Why do retirees count pennies? [/B][/B]
Answer: They are the only ones who have the time. [B]

[B]Question: What is the common term for someone who continues to work and refuses to retire? [/B][/B]
Answer: NUTS![B]

[B]Question: Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage?[/B][/B]
Answer: They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there. [B]

[B]Question: What do retirees call a long lunch?[/B][/B]
Answer: Normal [B]

[B]Question: What is the best way to describe retirement? [/B][/B]
Answer: The never ending Coffee Break. [B]

[B]Question: What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree? [/B][/B]
Answer : If you cut classes, no one can call your parents.
[B][B]Question: Why does a retiree often say he doesn't miss work,[/B][/B] [B][B]but misses the people he used to work wit[/B][/B][B][B]h[/B][/B][B][B]? [/B][/B]
Answer: He is too polite to tell the whole truth. [B]

[B]Question: What do you do all week?[/B][/B]
Answer: Monday to Friday; Nothing, Saturday & Sunday I rest. [B]

[/B]

Question: What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree?
Answer : Being surrounded by girls that are hot, age 18-21, and feel totally safe around you because of your advanced age!

I see your serious about my PM offer :) :)

[QUOTE=HURRICANEBOB;389880]Question: What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree?
Answer : Being surrounded by girls that are hot, age 18-21, and feel totally safe around you because of your advanced age![/QUOTE]

A little creepy, but understandable. :D

-Rich

I'm not sure if I'll be able to retire or not,I've all ready lost most of what I had invested thanks to the recession and I figure Social Security will be broke under the current administration pretty soon.:mad:

[QUOTE=kyfanatic;389930]I'm not sure if I'll be able to retire or not,I've all ready lost most of what I had invested thanks to the recession and I figure Social Security will be broke under the current administration pretty soon.:mad:[/QUOTE]

Past, current, and future administrations:it doesn't matter. Social Security is and was a Ponzi scheme that rivals anything Bernie Madoff could dream up.

I've got several years to go before I can draw my first Social Security check. I planned my retirement to NOT include any Social Security funds.