End of days....or just the beginning?

Will be 10 years this spring and the first 9 she was OK about the hunting and fishin. The last year has been different, we had our first and only child. He is great, but she has put the kabosh on the free time. He takes alot of TLC and time. I manage to get out once a month to fish. This is the start of hunting season and I don't know how it will turn out. I get to felling guilty when I'm gone all day fishin or hunting. By the way I give up golf completely. Good luck on your new adventure. It is a roller coaster. I can't wait til he is big enough to go with me!!!

I have been widowed twice now. First be honest about your fishing and hunting, tell em yer an addict, and plan on remaining one, make sure she undserstands that point. Take her with you and let her know how you feel. If she truly enjoys it, youi may have a pleasant problem, but dont demand tghat she goes with you. When the kids come, remember family first. I started to tourny fish with my cousin, and one day she said sit down and we need to talk.All of us [her and I and two kids like week ends too, and I was being selfish.We both knew that there wasn't enough money to continue my sporting life, and also she and I both santed our kids to go to a parichial school.. Never fished another week end tourny, my " bass boat" shrank in sze, both the kids were honor graduates at differnt universitys, and my son and I were fishing buddies.My daughter still baits the hooks for her kids, but they dont die for fishing.I cared for my first wife for over 6 weks aftyer her major stroke, but still she insisted that I keep on fishing.I was fortunate living close to the lakes I loved,and before the illness, she just nodded when I wanted to take a long trip for a couple of days, mostly yes, buit I didn't over do it. We lasted 28 yrs together, the second was only 15 yrs.Buit I tol;d them my feelingd before we were married, and if it was a problem, I was not the man for her. But its family first!!

As an old guy (55), and one married for most of my life, 22 the first time, 11 this time, I can assure you that it changes. Both marriages were great, 2nd still is. The first one got absorbed with kids, little league, school, etc, and we kind of lost sight of each other. If we had made it to this age, there is no doubt we would have still been together. She was never into anything outdoors but she loved attending club cookouts, Christmas banquets, etc. Now that I have time, this wife as well is not into the outdoors much, but she loves to go out on the boat. She will lay out on the rear deck all day with a book and a cooler and let me fish off the front as long as I want to. She is not much into cold weather and rain, but at least we are together. However, one key is to always invite them, whether you think they will accept, at least provide the opportunity. It shows you do care. The other item is advance notice. Both my wives never took to the "oh yeah honey, I am leaving at 4 in the morning and will be back Sunday night" deal at 9 on Friday night. Treat them as you would expect to be treated.

I've been married for 41 years,,,3 sons,,,7 Grandchildren !!!! It's Awesome

Good Luck eH..............IT IS .............Just the beginning! ;)

Man it is so OVER it's not even funny, good by boat good by fishing buddys. It all about her now, the closest you will get to Herrington now will be when you cross the bridge on the way to the mall in Lexington.LOL

If you look at marriage as the end, then the end it will be. If you look at it as a new beginning, then it will be great. Like was said earlier, it is a partnership that you must work at everyday, 7 days a week, 52 weeks a year. I was married for 35 yrs before I lost my better half to the dreaded BC. She loved to bluegill fish and I still remember to this day when I took her to Guist Creek fishing. We did not have a boat so I rented one and ROWED across the lake to a stickup, tied up the boat and we loaded it with large bluegill that we ate for supper. She was also expecting our first child. After that day I managed to buy a small 14ft boat and found a 5hp evinrude that we used every weekend to fish. Our son was with us sleeping in the bottom of the boat when he was 3 month old. She loved the outdoors because she and I both were raised on a farm. After out 2nd son was born I had to get a bigger boat as we still went bluegill fishing just to get out and to put food on the table. After the boys left home, she and I would still manage to go to willisburg or guist for some big bedding bluegill. I really miss those days, but I do have memories.

You couldn't have picked a better date! We're celebrating our 17th wedding anniversary this Saturday (October 3rd). It will be a BIG change to your life but that's a part of growing up. I guess I got lucky. Her dad is a big time hunter/fisherman so she doesn't know any better when I'm heading out to the river or coming home from Bass Pro with a truckload of lures. Just buy her a Coach Purse every now and then and it'll be all good. After 17 years I still say marrying her was the best decision I've ever made.

[QUOTE=stratos185;384675]If you look at marriage as the end, then the end it will be. If you look at it as a new beginning, then it will be great. Like was said earlier, it is a partnership that you must work at everyday, 7 days a week, 52 weeks a year. I was married for 35 yrs before I lost my better half to the dreaded BC. She loved to bluegill fish and I still remember to this day when I took her to Guist Creek fishing. We did not have a boat so I rented one and ROWED across the lake to a stickup, tied up the boat and we loaded it with large bluegill that we ate for supper. She was also expecting our first child. After that day I managed to buy a small 14ft boat and found a 5hp evinrude that we used every weekend to fish. Our son was with us sleeping in the bottom of the boat when he was 3 month old. She loved the outdoors because she and I both were raised on a farm. After out 2nd son was born I had to get a bigger boat as we still went bluegill fishing just to get out and to put food on the table. After the boys left home, she and I would still manage to go to willisburg or guist for some big bedding bluegill. I really miss those days, but I do have memories.[/QUOTE]

Sure does sound like you had your sole mate and I am sorry for your loss but happy that you have the memories. I read stories like this and wonder some times that life is just not fair to take a lady from a man that obviously loved her so much. I only hope that you find some solice in the memories for I know they are not the real thing but one day you will see her again and both of you will share that 14 footer again with worms and bobbers just waiting on the gills to bite for the two of you to have supper together again. Again, sorry for your loss but happy that you have the great memories. I could not imagine my life without my honey and only hope that I never have to.

It is what it is, and you and her will make it what you want it to be. Has it changed from the time you first met her till now? Certainly, things evolve. What has made it work so far? Sharing, compromising to make sure each gets a bit of what they want, honesty-telling it like it is, the way you feel, without threatening or anger. Married 29 years effective 15 Nov this year. Seems like we walked down the isle just a week ago. Good times, some disagreements, lots of shared goals, fears, and anxieties. It will work, and you will enjoy it if you and her just promise each other this:

-There's no I, its we, and we do what is best for both of us.
-We do what we agree on, even if we have to discuss it alot.
-When there is honest disagreement, the trust comes in. Someone has to be the one to compromise and trust the instincts of the other. And no score keeping. If it works out, you both won, if it turns out to be a bad decision, you both learn from it and move on.
-Don't go to bed angry. Agree to disagree, hug, and agree to discuss it again to get it resolved.
- Never miss an opportunity to make her smile. If you got $12 bucks left, and need bait, try $6 of bait and $6 of flowers. Believe me, you will feel much better about a fishing trip when you pull out of the drive way if she waves and smiles as you go. (Okay, got me there, my wife is always glad to see me go):)

It is what you make of it. Let her know up front on what you expect in your fishing or whatever. Before marriage I use to fish a couple of days a week with some tournaments thrown in there. Now I only fish around 10 times a year. It stinks, but nobody's fault but my own.

I will give you some advice that my Father gave me, and it has worked many times. There are 3 magical words to use to keep her happy, and in turn keep you happy, and they are...


"Youre Right Honey"

Marriage will change both of you, and for the better, its the toughest job you will ever have, but is also the most rewarding job you will ever have. Just remember that it takes two to do everything, cleaning, cooking, etc. etc. and dont ever take her for granted. Treat her like you want to be treated, and make sure she always feels special, compliment her everyday, even if she looks terrible, tell her she looks beautiful, and treat her with respect. Your life will change, and it will change her, but enjoy each other, because love is something that does not come around to many times, so enjoy it, and enjoy her. Good luck, and I wish you both the best.

I got married Oct. 25th last year - got the one year anniversary coming up.

I'm 28, and she just turned 28 a few weeks ago. We're both college graduates. We're both very independent people.

Several similarities here between you and I.

When people say that the first year is the toughest, believe me, it is. It's an adjustment period, and you'll find out that you'll have many differences between each other, and it's how you react and deal with those differences that will define whether you will make it or not.

Bringing two independent people together is probably the toughest scenario when it comes to marriage. You're probably used to doing things your way and on your schedule. Well you can pretty well throw that out the window now...or at least realize that that kind of life is over. From here on out, you can't do much without consulting with the other, it's all about compromise and achieving things together. Giving up that independence is where most people struggle. But the thing is, you give up that independence for something far greater! I struggled with it at first, but after a year now, it's pretty dang awesome! My wife and I have grown far closer than we could have imagined during this first year. There's been plenty of battles, some that were fierce and pretty much dumb (like picking paint colors for the house, who to visit on what holidays, where to eat dinner at, cheddar or american, etc.), but looking back it's part of learning how to work together to achieve things and make decisions.

There will be good times and bad times, and so far for me the good times have always outweighed the bad. The more time we spend together, the more I can't help but get excited about the future.

Congratulations on your wedding, and I hope that you and your bride will have a life full of good times and great experiences.

Happiness is best when shared.