Thanks Grumpy.........

I appreciate you "locking down" the other thread, as it was getting a bit personal. Some people were assuming the worst on my part, like putting fishing before my kids and messed up priorities, but I was not going to respond to them because I was not POSITIVE and was really kind of ashamed at what the underlying reason was until recently.
I found out a that my wife had "re-connected" with a boyfriend she had 13 years ago at a party a couple months back, but had no proof to such. In a recent fit of anger I decided to figure out how to look at my cell phone bill online and found over 119 calls, for a total of about 1000 minutes to this guy in 24 days. All happened while I WAS HOME with the kids, or when we were asleep at night (apparently he works the night shift so 2-4am are prime talking times for them). I confronted her a few days ago and she admitted to the whole thing, big suprise when I am holding a highlighted printout of the bill ehh?
I am only mentioning this on here now because I saw how easy it was for people to "assume" I was the culprit in this and NOT the victim. This is not to say I am innocent by any stretch, as I am sure i have not been perfect to live with and the long deployments to war changed her (and me) a little each time. I still do not think I deserved to be cheated on, they could have at least waited until she had TOLD me she wanted out. Better yet, its only 60 days to wait till they can do what they want without involving me at all. It hurts badly to even type this, but I could not let those last comments about me neglecting my kids go without saying something, so the truth is best no matter how it makes me feel/look.
As a note, I NEVER miss a practice or chance to play catch in the yard with my kids, as a matter of fact we play EVERY night at some point cause they look forward to it. I leave AFTER they go to bed to fish tournies so they don't have to say "good-bye" and just sleep in my truck. I have no family here in this state, I moved here because it is where she is from and I did not have a reason to say "no" when we discussed it. My fishing and boat are all I have most nights going forward cause I don't drink and don't like going out, especially alone. Crowds scare me and the idea of meeting women again is enough to give me an anxiety attack.
I already agreed to pay MORE than I am required to by the state in "child support" because the children ARE my life. I was only asking for a way to save my one vice, not saying I was going to give up or neglect the most important thing in my life....MY CHILDREN.
Sorry to ramble but I don't have ANYONE here to talk to and my family is not exactly a "close nit" group, so they are out. I appreciate the many supportive posts, PM's, and apologize for not fully disclosing the adultery thing upfront but I am not exactly proud of it happening to me and my kids.
I am no longer worried about what to do with the boat anyway, it will be what it will be and whatever. At this point I don't really care about anything to do with my life, but my kids. I have "lost my religion" in the mix of all this and spend most of my time reliving 13 years for answers that I cannot find. All it is doing is sending me into a deeper and deeper depression so who knows, and at this point who cares.

Rob

Dont give up brother! Talk to your preacher or family member and dont give up on your children or faith! Its a short journey here, live it up for the long haul and turn every bad thing into something positive!;) I fish from the bank, I loaned my boat to my best friend and aint got it back yet!:eek:

Yes thanks Grumpy for locking that thread. It was so negative and critical and in poor taste to pick on a person when they are down. Way too much assuming going on there. I will say some prayers for you Rob and wish you strength on this difficult journay you have to make. You are so fortunate to have those 4 wonderful children who will always be with you for life. Take care, Margie

id say after all that, you should be entitled to keep whatever the hell you want...and maybe her sister

[QUOTE=Embrey;385282]id say after all that, you should be entitled to keep whatever the hell you want...and maybe her sister[/QUOTE]
Are you another republican?:rolleyes:

[QUOTE=slippedcork;385285]Are you another republican?:rolleyes:[/QUOTE]if i had to pick one i guess...but i do hate obama...thanks for playing,but, what does that have to do with this at all

[QUOTE=Embrey;385290]if i had to pick one i guess...but i do hate obama...thanks for playing,but, what does that have to do with this at all[/QUOTE]

Better be, if you're getting in my **** boat :) :)

OK..........kidding........I had the most Liberal, Obama Lovin, Socialist in the universe on the boat this past weekend............

Funny thing.......we discussed politics all the way to the lake.....TALKED NONE about it on the lake, or in the hotel, and talked politics ALL the WAY BACK........

Funny how that works................

Eddie, if you are on here..........you're GOOD PEOPLE :) :)

Later,

Geo

Funny you should say "her sister" cause she is SMOKIN and a sweetheart, just could NEVER even think of seeing her "that way". I still remember the bracefaced little girl at my wedding and would have NEVER thought she would have turned out the woman she is today. Someone will be VERY lucky to get her as she is an AWSOME lady (to bad her sister, my wife, isn't more like her).

[QUOTE=cra97;385294]Funny you should say "her sister" cause she is SMOKIN and a sweetheart, just could NEVER even think of seeing her "that way". I still remember the bracefaced little girl at my wedding and would have NEVER thought she would have turned out the woman she is today. Someone will be VERY lucky to get her as she is an AWSOME lady (to bad her sister, my wife, isn't more like her).[/QUOTE]sounds like you got work to do then...:)

[QUOTE=GeoFisher;385293]Better be, if you're getting in my **** boat :) :)

OK..........kidding........I had the most Liberal, Obama Lovin, Socialist in the universe on the boat this past weekend............

Funny thing.......we discussed politics all the way to the lake.....TALKED NONE about it on the lake, or in the hotel, and talked politics ALL the WAY BACK........

Funny how that works................

Eddie, if you are on here..........you're GOOD PEOPLE :) :)

Later,

Geo[/QUOTE]i know enough about politics to know they all **** and talking about it ***** even more...lol

Keep yer head up. I come from a long line of divorces in my family. Dad married 5 times. Brother 5 times. Best friend 5 times. I am on #2. Now my wifes parents were married for over 50 years and so were my grandparents. I think it's harder in this day and age for a marriage to last as long do to constant outside influences and options. What makes it hard to me is the kids. Starting over is hard but not impossible. Believe me I have seen my dad and brother and best friend wiped out financially over and over and have each recovered as unbelievable as it seems. Lifes a book and your just beginning a new chapter. Don't be afraid of it. Embrace your newfound freedom and start setting goals for yourself. You are the only person on this planet you can control. Try not to focus on the sense of betrayal from your wife or it will eat you alive. She changed and wanted to go a different direction with her life and that was her decision. It doesn't mean it was a good one on her part, but it was her's to make and live with for the better or worst. Better her make that decision than you both living a lie for the rest of your lives. Now you have an opportunity take advantage of it and make your life what you want it to be. Do it for yourself and for your kids. Heck I'd do it out of spite if for no other reason. And don't worry there are plenty of other women out there waiting to take advantage of you. ;)

Once it's over I recommend not to get seriously involved for YEARS! You will for the most part be making a mistake iff you do. Learn to live on your own with the new rules and enjoy your kids. You don't need to find another wife or girlfriend it will be to easy to compare her to the old one and a rebound relationship is doomed to fail.
Get out and have fun...date but don't remarry....give it time.