I think I may have finally digested those burgers. Here's the story.

I'm not sure what I ate, but I'd been "crop dusting" all day. We went to Wal-Mart and I laid down a few clouds there. Then we went to Krogers and the same thing happened. Mrs.Tyme caught just a whiff at both locations and quickly walked away. This evening, Mrs.Tyme and I were vacuum packing the different meats we had purchased at Krogers.

Mrs.Tyme had left the kitchen to fetch something and I let loose another cloud of poisonous gas while she was absent from the hazard area. The aroma was a unique mixture of napalm, pepper spray, and atomized feces containing traces of onions and garlic and a yet unidentified substance that could be used by the military.

To my then horror, she returned before the invisible noxious cloud could dissipate. When she came into the kitchen doorway it appeared to me that the invisible cloud had enveloped her and grabbed her, preventing any escape on her part and that angry bees were attacking her as she flailed her arms about in an attempt to escape the burning, stinging aroma that hit her.

That's when I burst out laughing so hard that another silent eruption escaped from me. Again she was holding her breath but unable to leave the hazard area. The sheer look of horror yet acceptance on her face caused me to laugh harder and harder. I apologized for my transgression all the while laughing my a$$ off. Our marriage vows stated for better or worse and she definitely got the worse from me on this flagrant flatulence on my part.

Ah, the joys of 35 years of marriage.