Should I be upset or not?

[Cobra190]

In the most humble of winners, you'll find the most graciuos losers. That's how I was taught. You have to learn how to be a good loser before you become a good winner.
Spent many hours playing basketball with my son. I never let him win and to this day at 23, he has never beaten me. He doesn't get mad any more that I win and I've never mentioned to him that he's never won. The most important thing was that he never stopped trying. What kind of effort needs to be put out if you know you're going to wim in the end? Just enough effort to get through. In younger, toddler age children, you may have to let them win or they will not play the game, but wean them off and make sure they understand that you get nothing for nothing and if you want it you have to be willing to do what it takes and put forth the effort to get it.
So Kudos to you Bandit1, if you don't make the effort to stress your morals to your kid...Who will.
Oh yeah!!! I stopped fishing tourney's for fear that I was becoming too gracious a loser with all the practice I was getting.

[PROANGLER746]

I would agree with most everyone here. Was it just a statement made to mess with you or is he one of those people that feel breaking the rules just a little is ok. If I had grown up that way knowing or feeling that to break the rules just a little would get me by I would really hate to think what kind of person I would be today. I deal with the the future leadership of America almost everyday and I have to be as honest as I can and I will have no problem saying it. I AM SCARED AS HELL!!! What use to be the 1% of the younger population that caused the problems has changed to what I feel is more like 10%. Spoiled undisciplined disrespectful out of shape lazy or just plain mean. It has been almost 14 years of seeing the change.
You have to set the example of what is right and wrong or I will see your kids sooner or later and that is not a good thing 90% of the time.

[fishinchef]

New to posting but not to the reading......

I would not be upset by the comment, I would use that as a building block. We all want to catch fish but sometimes that is not the case. Tell your son you have to take the good with the bad. Look at all of us over the years that have Blanked a tourn. Even though we blank, we still come back.
Talk to the guy who made the comment and tell him how you feel. I'm sure he was meaning well when he said it, but... This is a sport of ethics, we are our only boss on the tourn. waters.

[offdtop]

Your son will now have one of tourney fishings greatest thrills - "We'll get em next time", he will try harder, be more focused even at his age , my son was because he didn't like losing and if more people don't like losing they will honestly try harder to win and do more homework on what they want to acheive. If he learns that lesson your buttons will pop off your shirt, and you are right by not "bending" the rules - kudos

[billbrewco]

While this scenario in itself is upsetting, you sound like a person that would respond with the right attitude. I applaud your concern. I'm sure that you used that opportunity to teach your child a 'life lesson'. He learned that sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. But in the end, it is his effort at having the courage not only to fish for that long, but go into the weigh-in holding his head high even though he came back with no fish. Then, when you were confronted with that ethical delimma, you told him that while some others choose to not play by the rules, he can rest easy at night knowing that he (and you) did the right thing.

I thank you for your concern, and I rest easier knowing that there are still people that have the courage to make the right and moral choice. Your son will grow up to be a leader, for when it comes his time, there will be a great number of people that have been misled all their lives and won't be able to function properly in this great world of ours. Your son will rise to the top simply by having a spine and a moral compass, all thanks to you.

[Bandit1]

Thank you all for your responses. I am glad to see it isn't just me. That makes me feal better about it all.

[Jabbo]

I always try to live my life by a few rules, I always try to say what I mean, mean what I say and I personally try to let Jesus guide me. I agree that there are winners and losers. I think this is a great opportunity to teach your son a valuable lesson(s). By not giving your son a fish, but teaching him how to fish and how to overcome difficult situations you essentially are teaching him how to fish for life, building his character and strength that he will use his entire life. You can use the example of other fathers giving their children fish to weigh (so that their kids won't feel bad), as a learning tool. Show him it's okay to not win. It is okay not to catch fish some days (even the pros do that). The important thing is that he tried and make sure that you express how much you enjoyed being with him on that day. I would also suggest getting into a small fishing tournament where you have a partner and you weigh fish collectively. I think this be a great thrill for him. Whether he caught them or not, you always refer to our fish, our catch, our weight our prize money our loss etc. No one ever has to know who caught what. It's a team! You do have to let him carry the bag to the scales and hand them to the official Your only here once. Make the most of it and keep on teaching ethics and integrity. I'd take this situation and use it as a learning tool for him and then cast it away from me like a booger. You know the saying.... Make Lemonade..
Good Fishin!!

[wkerber]

I guess my thought is that life is too short to worry about stuff like this. You have to live your life in a way that you can look back on it and be proud with how you lived it. Pass that value on to your son and you and him will both be just fine... and happier than most. Don't stop doing what you feel is right just to fit in.

[Newlight]

I feel you did exactly what you should have done to teach your child the right way. As a kid( a few years back, too numerous to mention ) I always looked up to my dad. He was my role model for what I did later in life. It wasn't so much what he said as to "what his actions were". I have been an honest person my entire life because of what he taught me as a kid. I always learned from him and then fought my own battles. He may have criticized me afterwards, but he let me learn my own lessons. Many of today's kids have it all handed to them on a silver platter and I say this as a retired secondary teacher where this problem really begins to show up in the kids who can't do for themselves ( because mom and dad did it for them). Keep up the good work as a parent, it'll pay off in the future!

[gar]

Like Newlight, I too am a retired secondary teacher and coach and I couldn't have said it any better. I wouldn't attempt to list the lessons I learned from my Dad and hope my son feels the same way someday.