Quote Originally Posted by BubbaBass1 View Post
Typing before thinking! After I posted I realized you where probably talking about the first time around.

Hey I'm kinda short on funds for my next trip to bass pro. Ya think I could get a piece of that stimulus?
I used to help write grants for the State Mental Health Department. Maybe I could give you some pointers on the fine art of showing a need in order to obtain government funds for your trip to Bass Pro. First you enlist the aid of everyone you know who has ever been fishing and give them a form. They report all their losses for things like tournament entry fees, gas, beer, lures, cell phones, pipes, sunglasses, damaged props, lost anchors, dead batteries, worn out trolling motors, lost rods and reels, broken lines, ptsd from threats by unhappy wives/jealous girlfriends, etc. Next form says you have to list the damages you will suffer if these funds are denied; be sure to include withdrawal symptoms such as nightmares of being eaten by a world record smallmouth and hallucinations of winning a tournament. The last forms are for you to show how the county, city, and state will benefit from the use of funds to prevent death by lack of tournament participation. You stand a good chance of getting the funds if you apply for the lifetime Bass Pro treatment. The government likes red tape so the more forms you file the better your chances of getting a fishing grant. The grant money is to be equally divided with those who filled out forms but don't worry, nobody checks to see how you spent the money.