Women and babies

[jcb]

When my wife had our first child, I was fascinated by the little Contraction-O-Meter by her bedside. One thing I learned: Say contraction #112 reads 110 on the Contraction-O-Meter, and contraction #113 reads 90. For the sake of discussion, say that your wife, on the other hand, screams twice as loudly on contraction #113 than she does on contraction #112.

No matter HOW much this flies in the face of all available empirical evidence gathered by the finest medical technology calibrated to the ultimate degree, do NOT say: "Wow, honey, that one shouldn't have hurt as much as the one before."

[Tyme2fish]

Well, the hens are cackling and strutting and vocalizing like roosters.

The baby has arrived.

I was only in the boat barn for a three beer tour.

[bassin_bug]

The reason women scream during labor is because they're excited it's almost over. It has nothing to do with a bouncing baby entering this world through such a small orifice. They don't call a baby's birth a miracle for nothing. Easy! Piece of cake! That's why men don't have babies; they're tough and need something much more difficult to do, say, maybe trying not to puke while changing a dirty diaper. lol
I just couldn't help myself.

[kyfanatic]

The reason women scream during labor is because they're excited it's almost over. It has nothing to do with a bouncing baby entering this world through such a small orifice. They don't call a baby's birth a miracle for nothing. Easy! Piece of cake! That's why men don't have babies; they're tough and need something much more difficult to do, say, maybe trying not to puke while changing a dirty diaper. lol
I just couldn't help myself.

My dad (in his 80's) was telling his female cousin(in her 90's) about how the pain in his sciatic nerve from a ruptured disc was the worst pain he had ever felt,she said well you should feel childbirth.He thought a minute and said "well,I probably would have,but nobody ever got me pregnant".

Just so you know,I have helped raise 3 children and changed more than my share of dirty diapers,and any other blessing of parenthood,but none compares to having my 10 year old force me to ride the upside down spinning caged ferris wheel at the county fair with him,I'm too old for that stuff.