How do I save my boat??

[cra97]

Ok, I hate to admit failure but I have suffered a HUGE setback in the last couple weeks. My wife, of 13 years, whom I have 4 children with decided she no longer wants to be married to me. I am not handling this real well mentally, or otherwise, but I need to know if any of you can provide advice on my situation. This WILL eventually bankrupt me, no way around it with all things considered. I will stay it off as long as I can, but it is inevitable. My question is this: How can I keep my boat in this process? I am technically a "Professional", since I am on a team, but will that be enough reason to be able to keep it? I am only asking here because I have no real "friends" in Louisville to turn to and I have heard a couple people mention going through these before. We are using mediation for the process and she does not want to boat, so that's not an issue. I am worried about when this thing sinks me, cause I have a loan on it and Chapter 11 (according to the one attorney I have spoken to in general terms) is going to be MY only route to come out ok on the other end. I understand about Ch. 13, but that will not work.
Would putting it in someone else's name and just paying for it work best, or is there some other way I may be overlooking? Thanks for any help anyone can be and if it cross's your mind PLEASE send a prayer up for my children that they may come out of this as well as possible. NOTHING is killing me more right now than the thought of what this is going to do to my 11, 8, 5, and 4 yr olds, even though I am biting the bullet and making this look as "clean" as possible in front of them.....at least for their sake I NEED to do that much.

Thanks,

Rob

PS. Anyone know a good BR attorney in the Louisville area, one I can TRUST?

[GeoFisher]

Sorry buddy, but I personally think you need to DIVORCE the boat, and save the marriage.

[slippedcork]

Sorry buddy, but I personally think you need to DIVORCE the boat, and save the marriage.

X2

[Booyah]

Sorry to hear about the divorce first of all. I've had several people close to me go through it and it's never an easy thing. As for the boat, I did have one friend that "sold" his boat to another friend. His friend legally owned the boat and assumed the payments on it, but the divorcee made those payments. Talk to your attorney about this scenario. It would obviously have to be someone close to you that would trust in your making the payments to them... Hope this helps and wish you and your family the best during this tough time.

[GeoFisher]

Sorry to hear about the divorce first of all. I've had several people close to me go through it and it's never an easy thing. As for the boat, I did have one friend that "sold" his boat to another friend. His friend legally owned the boat and assumed the payments on it, but the divorcee made those payments. Talk to your attorney about this scenario. It would obviously have to be someone close to you that would trust in your making the payments to them... Hope this helps and wish you and your family the best during this tough time.

That is ILLEGAL, and FRAUD........

Not to mention TAX evasion, and a few other things............and merely posting it here is enough to get you in how water.

Later,

Geo

[ryan_ekubass]

ask your self this question... what is the reason causing this divorce..... if its the boat because u are over spending on fishing and always gone fishing the tournaments or is it something else... also ask yourself this.... even if i get to keep my boat and i am broke anyways how am i going to be able to afford to go fishing... why pay the money on the boat payment if you cant put gas in it and its just setting there in the garage... and i know personally there is no person on this earth that i would assume a loan for so they could keep their boat or atv or motorcycle.. the way the loan people see that is its a pleasure item its not a necessity... it might be in your case since you are listed as a pro but i dunno.... i have not a clue what is going on in your life or what is causing problems but sometimes you just have to bite the bullet and let the material things go....

[Jabbo]

I have to agree with the other fella's on this post. I would ask my self these questions.. Do I believe in a higher authority? Who was my best man? When I stood there in front of all those people and swore to love her till death do us part in the eyes of God, am I letting him down? Your best man probably also took this oath. His was probably to support the marriage. The next question is what means more to me, my children and family or my boat? If you chose the boat there may be some issues to work out besides the marriage. I am not judging you, That is not my job. I will pray for you and I hope God blesses you to make all the right decisions. I had a similar decision to make in my life at one time, although I am not a pro. I gave up my boat and made sure I was available for my kids and wife. I now have a much nicer boat and a much better marriage and family. Once I got my priorities right I was rewarded. You only have one life to live. It would really **** to have a boat and not much else in the form of healthy relationships. I think that you both should sit down and air out everything. I mean everything!! Get to the bottom of the issues and start rebuilding a strong foundation. I promise your kids will thank you for it when they get older and better understand the situation. I'm sorry for your situation and hope everything works out. It has been my experience that when I don't think I can handle any thing else and life has collapsed on me that I turn to God. You won't regret it, He will take care of you!! All you have to do is ask.

[cra97]

I guess I should have gone more in-depth on my original post cause I TOO AGREE with all of you. I would have GLADLY gave up the boat, poles, fishing, AND my right arm to save this marriage. I have asked her to go to counseling (even offered for her to choose the person to see so it would be comfortable for her), ask her "why?", can I do/change in any way to save this marriage, can we talk to the pastor, ect. All my requests, which I did to my own suprise in a calm manner and loving voice, have been met with her comment about "its just been brewing over the last 13 years and should have happened a long time ago".
Brothers, if I may call you that, I would like NOTHING MORE than to keep MY family intact. I am the product of TWO divorces and swore I would NEVER let that happen to me, or my kids, EVER!! I realize she has gone through a lot with me too though, 9 years of the military and being deployed ALL the time (not to mention during TWO pregnancies), the PTSD, nightmares, anxiety disorder, mood swings from meds, ect, ect. I know I am not perfect and this is MY fault somehow. I also STRONGLY BELIEVE in the oath I took before God. I placed a "circle" on my finger that represents my ENTIRE LIFE. We wear these because there is no end to a circle, as is supposed to be the case in your marriage, but I cannot save this ALONE and she is not willing to try. I have gotten and apartment about 1/2 mile from where we live so that I can be close to them, and I am REALLY PRAYING that in time she will see "us" in a different light and maybe we can work it out. She told me this was a "futile dream" I had, but I could "do what I want".
I apologize for airing my problems on here, I really do. The problem, well one of them anyway, I have is that I have NO "friends" with whom to converse over this. The isolated feeling I have right now is sending me SO far into major depression I have considered everything, including if they would be better off without me at all. I could not do that because of my belief in the Bible (which says that gets me a one-way ticket to hell) and my kids. My children mean the WORLD to me, bar nothing, and I WANT to be here for them whenever I can.
We are using a mediator and have agreed to 50/50 coustody, but I have had to make some financial considerations to get this.
Ryan, I am NOT going to be "broke" by any means, but I will not be able to keep ALL the things we currently have loans on with two households to support. I am not going to go into specifics, but financially the ONLY route I have to get out of some to the things, and not kill us both financially (many things are worth less than we owe in the current economy, but nothing more than the real-estate we have, and we would have to take around $200K loss to get out of it all now so....). Anyway, I do not take any of what you all have said "personally", as I would have offered the same advice if I did not know what I, personally, have done/tried up to now.
Thanks for responding and I guess I will have to pay a lawyer for some advice on this one.

Rob

[Jabbo]

It's great to hear that you are praying and have trying to work it out!! And I for one want to offer an ear should you ever need to vent. Either on here or PM. I know a lot of the guys on here and they offer pretty sound advise. Sorry I can't offer you more. Just know that God will answer your prayers. It may not be the answer your looking for, but he will answer you.

[bob46]

sell the boat and buy a boat of lesser quality.. Be the best fisherman out there not the best looking. Good luck I hope everything works out for you If not im glad to see you are thinking of your children.

[bassin_bug]

Ok, I hate to admit failure but I have suffered a HUGE setback in the last couple weeks. My wife, of 13 years, whom I have 4 children with decided she no longer wants to be married to me. I am not handling this real well mentally, or otherwise, but I need to know if any of you can provide advice on my situation. This WILL eventually bankrupt me, no way around it with all things considered. I will stay it off as long as I can, but it is inevitable. My question is this: How can I keep my boat in this process? I am technically a "Professional", since I am on a team, but will that be enough reason to be able to keep it? I am only asking here because I have no real "friends" in Louisville to turn to and I have heard a couple people mention going through these before. We are using mediation for the process and she does not want to boat, so that's not an issue. I am worried about when this thing sinks me, cause I have a loan on it and Chapter 11 (according to the one attorney I have spoken to in general terms) is going to be MY only route to come out ok on the other end. I understand about Ch. 13, but that will not work.
Would putting it in someone else's name and just paying for it work best, or is there some other way I may be overlooking? Thanks for any help anyone can be and if it cross's your mind PLEASE send a prayer up for my children that they may come out of this as well as possible. NOTHING is killing me more right now than the thought of what this is going to do to my 11, 8, 5, and 4 yr olds, even though I am biting the bullet and making this look as "clean" as possible in front of them.....at least for their sake I NEED to do that much.

Thanks,

Rob

PS. Anyone know a good BR attorney in the Louisville area, one I can TRUST?

When you file bankruptcy you have to list EVERYTHING, and I mean everything that you owe. You cannot "overlook" the boat that you are so in love with; it goes on the list also and the last thing you want to do is hide it. All the courts have to do is get a copy of your credit report and they WILL see that you have a boat. It is probably registered at the court house, by the lender, as an outstanding debt. You can ask to keep it but it is not an item that is necessary to provide transportation to your job and it is not your main source of income or the place you live. The Bankruptcy Courts will not look upon it with favor.

[DJD]

Sorry that your going through this man. Been through a divorce myself with kids and it sukked bad. I got through it and you will too. Just consider whats best for the kids and the rest will work out..I promise things get better. Get to church, talk with your pastor and start letting God guide you it's the best advice and your eyes will see this tragic situation in a different light.