to th guy who tried to mug me

[ironhead70]

To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown carrollton night before last.
Date: 2009-10-7, 1:43 a.m. E.S.T.

I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend, threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings. I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message.
First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect you to actually crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason. My girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber Model 1911 .45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening. Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head ... isn't it?!
I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with that brown sludge in your pants.. I'm sure it was even worse walking bare-footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again].
After I called your mother or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well as those of four other people in the gas station, -- on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 150 gallons and was extremely grateful!
I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!]
I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb ... after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car.
Later, I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell phone. Ma Bell just now shut down the line, although I only used the phone for a little over a day now, so what 's going on with that? Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target.
The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.).
In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path you've chosen to pursue in life. Remember, next time you might not be so lucky.Have a good day!
Thoughtfully yours,
ironhead70

P.S. Remember this motto ... An armed society makes for a more civil society

[DJD]

Great little story...I love it as much as the first time I read it.

[Embrey]

if that is real...awesome

[RICHYD4U]

I've got to know if this is a true story. Sounds to good to be real.

-Rich

[kyfanatic]

Now come on,When the heck was the last time somebody was ever mugged in Carrollton?
Might have been a drunken fight at the VFW,but I don't ever remember there being a robbery there.

[know1]

Good story. I suspect it's fake, but if it isn't you could get in real trouble using someone else's credit card and making threatening calls even if they are on someone else's phone.

[Embrey]

who cares...

[kyfanatic]

It's just an email that's been passed around the internet for about a year now. I just wouldn't have used Carrollton for the city,I think Louisville would have been more appropriate,originally it was Atlanta.

[DJD]

Now come on,When the heck was the last time somebody was ever mugged in Carrollton?
Might have been a drunken fight at the VFW,but I don't ever remember there being a robbery there.

lol that's true! Like I said originally I liked the story when I read it before but I believe it was Atlanta or Chicago.

[ironhead70]

it was savannah and it was fake just for fun i copy and pasted it from anthor site and changed the town

[Tim_T]

Snopes list it as undetermined, but it has circulated from various cities. Probably not true, but a great story none-the-less!

http://www.snopes.com/crime/justice/mugger.asp

[HiDefFisherman]

Sounds to me like someone BROKE several laws, and may well find himself in jail, as opposed to the one who should be there, the guy who "tried" to commit the crime.

I seem to be in the minority here, but comitting a crime yourself is no way to handle someone who may comitt a crime against you!!!

Should this tall tale actually be real, I am sure Peter will capture all the important information, such as IP address, etc..to provide to the proper authorities. After all, this is clearly an admission of guilt.

Tight lines...

'basser