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I have been sick for a while now and just this year a new wrinkle has shown up I now have lymphoma on top of end stage renal failure. I some times wonder what I did to deserve all of this and I will see someone else worse off than me and wonder why not me what makes me better than anyone else. I cry alot and wonder what if I don't make it and how will my family handle it without me, I do not cry in front of the family or my friends thank goodness for showers and rain. I don't cry for me but for them what am I putting them through I try not to be gripey and bad tempered but sometimes when you had all you can handle for a while you let fly with a stupid remark. I was on the phone with my doctor in Nashville, my 4 year old grandaughter was in the room, we were talking about a bone biopsy, to try and determine exactly what kid of cancer it is. The Doc said 2 years if your lucky Mr. Wooten and I said 2 years what and he came out with it and told me with the Kidney failure and chemo 2 years would be a good run. I said good bye and I was stunned I had not expected this from a doctor over a phone. My grandaughter looked at me and climbed up gave me a hug and a kiss. In a while I got my self together and went to look for her she was setting on her swing set and looking up toward a tree top and talking. She has a great imagination and has lots of secret friends who usally do all the bad stuff around the house and she will yell at them for getting her in trouble. She saw me standing there and said come here poppy and set down we have to talk. So I set down with her and she said paw look right there at that big fluffy cloud ain't it pretty, and I said yep sure is did you make that cloud, and she said no silly only god can make a cloud, and he can make it go away too. Then she looked me in the eye and took my hand and I swear she sounded twenty four not four. Paw you know god did not make you sick, and I said yes baby I do. Then she looked up at that cloud and said but you know he can make you better, just like that cloud. I was dumb founded and then she said me and him were talking a minute ago paw and he said you were going to be sick but it would be alright cause he said you were mine and I was yours and we both belong to him. Then she said and he told me if I loved him he would take you and keep you safe for me and not let them doctors take you away. Then she said and someday we will all have our own cloud to play on and no one will be sick, but till then you are stuck with me paw cause you ain't going no where except maybe blue gill fishing ok paw, Then the Ice cream truck came over the hill and my little girl had to have 2 dollars hurry paw hurry. I stood in the back yard and stared at that cloud and wished he would speak to me, but the Boss knows a true heart when he sees it and if that little girls says it so I believe her. No matter what, I have one angel on my side already, dirty face and all.
Man to all of those out there who are sick or hurting in some other way I hope you find your angel here on earth, mine just dripped fudge all over my truck seat.
Good luck and God bless
and may his angels always be here for us.
Senior Member
Man those littles ones sure do speak from the heart. I'll pray for you and your family in these tough times. Your posts have a great message in them that shine through the hard reality of cancer and loved ones dealing with that aweful disease. (Been their in my own family and now it's heart disease we are dealing with....my father)
I bet you never look at a cloud the same way....I know I won't. Thanks for the great story and enjoy that little Angel from God. God Bles, Don
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I will say a prayer for you and your family.
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Prayers sent from here Poppy and thanks for sharing that story.
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Psalm 8:1-5
"O Lord, our Lord, how excellent is Your name in all the earth! who hast set Your glory above the heavens.
Out of the mouth of babes and sucklings have You ordained strength because of Your enemies, that you might still the enemy and the avenger.
When I consider Your Heavens, the works of Your fingers, the moon and the stars, which You have ordained;What is man that You are mindful of him? and the son of man that You visit him?
For You have made him a little lower than the Angels, and have crowned him with glory and honor."
I think your little granddaughter explained these scriptures to you more clearly than any minister ever could. You are so blessed to have that little Angel speaking such words of wisdom at this difficult time. She may be the "sling" that God has sent to carry your broken heart until it heals again. Rejoice!
Please know that you are in our prayers.
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Your courage and strength is touching and truly inspirational BigPoppy (Dennis, if I remember correctly). God bless that little girl, and you, and your family. You hang in there man. Hope I see you out on Barren real soon.Originally Posted by BigPoppy
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That is a very touching story. I tend to be a wise acre and attempt to inject some humor into a story,but not this time.
I TRUELY bleive your granddaughter was in touch with our Lord.
Now go and catch some bluegills!!!
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You and your family are in my prayers. Your story was very touching. Childrens hearts are pure, they are not yet tainted with the junk of todays garbage. When they say something they truely mean it, you have a nice family Dennis, be proud.
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BigPoppy, I have been under the weather with kidey stones for 3 weeks and have surgery scheduled for next week. I have been pretty miserable and wondering why and kinda feeling sorry for myself. I read your post and once my eyes dried up a little I realized how lucky I am God bless you and Your entire family may there be many bright days in your future Thanks for sharing Joe G
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Joe I have turned to the folks here on this board for many years now, I know that they are real people who care and their prayers can and do make a difference. We all need help now and then sometimes that one word of prayer or encouragemnt can change your day or even your life. I have been a lucky man, a wife of thirty years I live in a country where we can speak our mind. I found this board where I have friends I have never seen, but I can always turn to. I hope God guides the hands of your doctors and your recovery is quick, kidney stones make a man glad he is a man, can you imagine being a woman trying to pass a 7 pound baby if those tiny stones can hurt so bad.LOL.
And to all the others who have replied to my post thank you guys, I go to the Hemo doctor on wensday again I will let you know what he says. Good luck Joe let us know how it goes for you and I hope god blesses us all and our Country!
Senior Member
Great post Poppy. My thoughts are with you and your family. Sometimes it seems that children are more in touch than we seem to relize and give them credit for, that fudge stain is special, a little reminder from your angel. Be strong. If you are able come down to the KBFN st championship weigh in at the new ramp at Port Oliver, the 25 and 26th of this mth. I will be the one with the hair, and hopefully a heavy weigh in bag. Good luck
Senior Member
thoughts and prayers for your family and you..my grandmother was a woman of great faith,she had throat cancer,took all the chemo and radiation and the docs still gave her less than a year..she lived cancer free for 14 years,died after my grandfather,from being lonesome and wanting to be with her husband,not cancer..she prayed every day,i never seen her even worry about dieing from it.
why did you look up and wait for him to talk?he already had...there is a song that comes to mind,i havn't heard for awhile,,,what if she's an angel..
oh and take her bluegillin,,some of my best memories are fishin with the granddads..
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